counting my blessings

I so rarely do it. I'm highly skilled in the art of self-pity. I know all the best means of wallowing in the muck and mire of life's challenges and sing of my woes at the top of my lungs.

Disgusting, really.

Father, You are so faithful and I am continually faithless. Please accept my simple (and deeply heartfelt) "Thank You." for Your patience, love and kindness.

I'm starting a list of 1000 blessings. I will think of and then meditate on 1 blessing everyday, which God in His mercy and grace has blessed this ill-deserving sinner with. I most likely will not faithfully attend to this list...when was the last time I even wrote on this blog? But I will try.

Seriously. I mean it.

What better day and way to start out this list than on this day of all days?!

My anniversary!

1. My husband.

Oh, my sweet, dear, precious husband. Next to my even more supremely precious Jesus, I can think of nothing more profound and important in my life than you, dear man. Not even the breath in my lungs is more cherished than you. God, in His infinite mercy and grace, gave me to you...you who deserve so much better. Jacob, you are my protector, my closest confidant, my number-one fan, my climbing buddy in whom I intrust my life, my Song of Solomon lover, my late-night movie and ice cream pal, my best friend and God's saving grace in my life. You know exactly where I was headed before Jesus put you in my path to stop the downward spiral. I was filthy with sin and shame and you loved me any way. I am nothing if not a challenge (of the greatest magnitude) to love, and yet you do. You love deeply and completely.

Wow...words simply do you, my love, no justice.

You have seen me and endured me at my absolute worst, but you stand firm as my rock. With outstretched arms, you embrace me and softly sing in my ear "You are my sunshine..."

We've delivered 3 beautiful daughters into this world now; I say "we've delivered" and not "I've delivered" quite deliberately. I could not have made it through one moment of those labors without your incredibly strong arms holding me up, sustaining me through every single contraction, nor without your gentle words of adoration and encouragement, pressing me closer to the joyful birth of our lovely little ones.

Has it only been 4 years? It feels like I've never known a time without you because your love is such a healing, consuming force. It feels like only a day because, as the old adage goes, "Time flies when you're having fun."

Jacob, you are my blessing of the highest order and today I meditate on God's supreme goodness in light of your blessing on my life. I love you.

And Father, I love You. For all You have given me that I did nothing to earn and for all You have given despite all I have done to make myself so totally unworthy, I give You my praise, adoration, worship, awe and thanks.